Screen Time Addiction

I liked your topic. The clarity of the voiceover could be improved with your final draft. I found the pacing slightly quick causing me not to be able to pick up on as much of the great facts that were included. I really liked how you included many expert clips into your essay which added intrigue. Overall, I really liked your topic and information, cleaning up the audio clarity and pacing should make for a great audio essay!

I agree with Logan about the pacing issue. Another thing I noticed was a discrepancy in the volume of your voice versus the clips you used. Also, along with what Logan said, it seems like there's something making some of your narration run together and makes it hard to hear. While your audio was very helpful and fitting, I would consider if you want to use that much audio rather than speaking more. 

I like the way the narration quickly captures key points. You may be able to use some music or other ambient sounds to transition into the piece. Some of the narration seems to have some issues with the audio quality that we can try to iron out. The first audio sample might be trimmed a bit. I feel like there is a bit of work needed to transition out of the second audio clip and into the stopping cue narration segment. In many ways, the stopping cues seems to be the core of the piece, so making sure that tracks throughout will be helpful. The transition out of the attention span clip might be smoother. I like the way the piece wraps up. Nice work.

I think some of your transitions might be able to be smoother, but all in all your audio essay was very good! Your pacing was a little quick, and your recording in some parts might have needed some higher quality, but your topic was well thought out and I enjoyed listening. 

This was a great essay overall and I enjoyed listening to it. I do agree with most of the comments above though so I won't say things that have already been said. I think with a better microphone and maybe some practice with the narration, this could really be brought to the next level.